I just wait for weekends so that I can visit my mom and relax at home ,place where I have been born and brought up , where I can relate to myself ,where I don’t feel like lost in crowd.. Every weekend on Saturday’s I get up early pack my bags and travel to Meerut. Last weekend I took bus from AnandVihar and choose to sit nearby a couple. As soon as the bus started for Meerut soon I guess I was just lost in to some thoughts when suddenly my mind diverted towards the discussion the couple sitting next to me was having. Husband said “See Santro ka mausam aa gaya , wo dekho santre” Wife said “No they are lokat”. Husband didn’t agree ,”nahi wo santre the wife Nahi wo lokat the” .. They both were not coming to an agreement and then they decided to keep shut. After moving few Km ahead husband again said “wo dekho santre hi hai na” pointing towards a thela and wife replied to this, “hmm ye santre hia lekin wo lokat the” 🙂
Both stick to their version 🙂
Noticed something ??
They both were talking about their version , Both knew the difference between lokat and santra both knew what is lokat and what is santra , they didn’t just gave a thought to this . I was wondering that Why Wife didn’t thought that my husband knows what is santra and he can’t be wrong and why husband didn’t think that She knows difference between Santra and lokat , she must have seen lokat , she can’t be wrong ?
I am sure both were correct the husband saw santre wala thela and wife saw a lokat thela. Both were correct ,but the problem was :-
1. Their was lack of trust
3. No effort to try to understand the other person
4. Some kind of zid in both apni bat manwane ki
I guess EGO , ZID to prove themselves right , blocks our thought process, we just think in the box , what we have seen , we do not think out of the box what the other might or Must have seen or in such a situation
Its always happens that we just see our version and we do not try to understand in what situation the other person can be .
Recently few days back I was in a great trouble ( its ok now 🙂 ) , I yelled for help from my friend , she said she will get back , I waited for her reply for few days but she didn’t reply.. I was very angry at her atleast she could have said NO that would not be a problem and I would not have waited for her reply or help for so long and would have looked for other options … I fought with her , At that time she just said sorry and kept quiet . After few days .. we were on phone and this topic again rose ,I started getting angry over her again , She tried telling me why u get angry all the time try to understand , the other person can be in some problem , but i was not liestening , She than finally told me about her problem which was bigger than mine and that was the reason she could not reply and she just didn’t tell me coz i was already in problem , would have got worried .I felt so small and guilty that i could not be with her in the worst of times i was just so engrossed in my life and problems , why i could not have understood that she can also be in problem , why i just saw my side , why my trust over her shaked in times of trouble , what made me think that she would not help me …
Its just that .. I just closed my eyes and was just able to see what i am seeing , what i am thinking , i was making my assumptions on the basis of what i am seeing and not taking the consideration about the unseen…what about contingency which we consider even when we do project estimations , why dont we do it in our real life ??
I know this was a very small thing and in life there are so many such issues and things happening which we generally forget , which do not effect lives as such , but actually THEY DO , they do affect us in very small EMI’s. They pile up.They burn our pockets of happiness.. like i lost so much of time in being angry over my friend . Definitely these will kinds of things wont lead to BIG SAD things but surely will lead to a leakage in your life from where small happiness will vanish gradually. you will stop enjoying a softy or a gol gappe sort of things … I hope you get my point …
Well I guess no java code , no google nothing can be as difficult as to keep up a good relationship ..
you really need to TRUST , you really need to SEE ON THE OTHER SIDE as well , wear the other person’s shoes, you really need to NOT TO loose faith in bad times…
We really need to put in efforts to keep our life happy , to enjoy small things to increase our bank balance of love of our friends and relatives and Family ( money balance bhi chahiye bhai 🙂 )